Category: Humor

The Nobel Peace Prize: Family and Friendship can make you successful in life

Posted on by sillykhan

If you watch The Big Bang Theory, the theory is family and friendship will make you successful in life.

Getting a Nobel Peace Prize is far better than Emmy, Grammy, Oscars, and the Tony awards. Seeing celebrities is obvious they will win, because of their portrayal of a character that makes us believe that they embody that character and make us think that they were real, and we applaud for there performance.

Getting a Nobel Peace Prize, is the highest award of all. Scientist solving the world’s problem. We could be a scientist.  Why is it f—-ed up? It could be economy, crime, drugs (we have too much of crime and drugs already), and what technology can help us do.

Teacher and Professor are stressing their students to become great thinkers and be better leaders. Find a solution and make  America great. We need engineers. We need great minds and able to work together.

When we see our child growing up, what are there dreams and goal in life. It may cost money. There are our children, and we must help them in any way we can to make them succeed in life. They have to take what’s in front of them and make it better for they could survive in this reality of life. No one is going to hand over things for them; when they get older, they have to work and be responsible. Parents should be involved in their child education. Who are the best teachers for their children – the parents? They know their child better than teachers in the public school.

I never know the writing is a powerful message to reach other people and share our ideas and knowledge of what we know. I hated writing when I was younger. But I found out, that we can create stories and fantasy by writing. Cursive handwriting is not obsolete. It’s mandatory.  

Now we have videos and YouTube, and they stress the same thing. We have to write about what we want to share. We have to edit ourselves. My professors and teachers stress this every day keep a journal, that is your backup, your secrete, your life. Keep it with you. If you keep it on a computer, sometimes computers can get a virus or crashes. Save it to a cloud drive, and you can access it anywhere. But make sure you have enough storage and remember your password.

Every day, we see crime and drugs, and it must stop.  What’s the solution? Built something big. Built something that people can’t penetrate. Don’t hurt or kill people; that’s blood on your hands. We have to stop crime, that’s why we need engineers. Math and science or the STEM program can help us in the future.  

So when they graduate from High School, College or University. It’s the knowledge and research they have to do, and they must apply what they know.

It Looks Like Rein (Rain) Deers

Posted on by sillykhan

loch Ness Hurrican flo

We are all experts in something, and we have skill and talents. We can play an instrument, sing, dance, and act. But how much do we know about our weather?

We can quickly, look out the window and tell that a storm is coming or watch it on the news before and we post it on Facebook. When we write a post on Facebook, we could be overdramatic in our writing. We all want to be a journalist one day and tell the truth, and they are fake news all over the place. Spreading rumors like there’s a shark swimming in the city or they found a Loch Ness monster too.  

Sharkando?

Loch Ness Monster?

Really?

When posting a post on facebook just informed people to be safe and take cover.  Scaring them, people would panic. Like it’s the storm of the century, it’s the big one, and it’s the end of the world! We are not going to die just because the storm is coming, it might flood some areas, but what we can do is prepare ourselves before the storm is coming. Get your supplies before the store shelves are empty!

The news is the best source of what to do when the storm comes in your area. For example, when reporters tell you the safest part of the room is the bathroom. If we go to the toilet, how will we know if someone wants to go to the bathroom and we are in the bathroom? What about privacy when using the bathroom? Then,  someone flushes the toilet!

The weather apps on your cell phone, but are they accurate to forecast the storm and other daily forecasts? Do you know most people either use it or not before they go out? They expect the weather will be the same as yesterday. Do people check the weather before they go out?  Probably not. They depend on weather apps on their phone and the national weather channel. Have you ever watch your local TV weather in your local area? Before you go out? You will never know what kind of weather you will have tomorrow. It could be raining squirrels!

How to Watch Basketball at Work

Posted on by sillykhan

If you are a basketball fan, I am too. Sometimes I get bored at work, and I would watch basketball at work too on the work computer. When the boss or supervisor comes by, I will close my browser, but the sound does not cut off. You can still hear the noise.

“What you watching?” Boss said.

“I am watching P-. I meant the latest meetings are discussing how to cut a cucumber” I am a bad liar. It’s HR fault making these videos of what not to do in an office; they are not creative.

“Just get back to work and turn it off, Karen is getting aroused.”

“Yes, Mr. Roy”

That’s was the third time this week, I meant watching the game. Luckily, I did not get fired or get suspended. It looks like he liked me, and I do the work, and he knows I get the job done.

Basket 2a

basket ball 3

When watching Basketball online, I have noticed there’s a boss button on the NCAA website. You can check the scores or watch the game. Watch the game with your earphones and clean it with alcohol wipes.  It’s nice to leave one of the headsets open while watching the game. When you hear your name called from the office, you can hit the button on the side and close it. It will cut the sound off too.

So who will win the game? Comment below.

 

Why Don’t People Return Their Shopping Carts?

Posted on by sillykhan

shopping cart

Have you ever gone to a mall, shopping center or a grocery store and there’s an empty parking space between two vehicles before you turn into that space, you see a shopping cart!

What to do? Do you wish people can return a simple shopping cart to the right place even though the place is half a mile to the store!

They have a cart receptacle in the parking place, and still, there are far away too. Or people have a child, and they don’t want to leave a child unattended for three seconds, it’s the holidays, and people are in a rush.

Shopping cart grass

They leave a shopping cart near a tree on a grassy hill or let it roll away to pond where the ducks are eating a hamburger on the road. Don’t give a duck a CPR, if it is choking on a hamburger, that would be dangerous. Just let it go. Walk away. You have not committed a crime. It will survive. One quack it will fly out of the duck’s mouth. I have seen it. I got hit by one, the other day. It wasn’t that good. Luckily, I got insurance by Aflac!

If you park next to cart receptacle, then it is good. You can unload the items in your car and put the cart in the receptacle. If you hear a baby crying, when you walk away then you forgot one item. Don’t do that.

Please return the shopping carts to the receptacle.

It’s the holidays. We are always in a rush and traffic is getting worst. Accidents may occur when getting home. If you ever get stuck in traffic, just be patience. Call ahead and tell them there’s an accident and will be home soon. The first responders are doing their best to remove what’s on the road quickly, and you will be home soon.

An Eagle Without His Head

Posted on by sillykhan

When I graduated from High School, I did something unusually and probably students in my class may not remember it at all. It happened 31 years ago, here’s the story:

Our mascot was the eagle. Not the real Eagle.  No did I not. People have dirty minds.

Oh well, it was the costume. No one knew I was in the Eagle Costume. I did not steal it, but I borrowed it. It was laying around in the girl’s locker room. Luckily, the girls were outside cheering for the basketball game.  It was my first time in a girl’s locker room. I did not see anything. But the shower was running. No, I did not peek. Maybe a little. I was curiosity. So, I saw it. Whew. It was big and cute. Not that big, cute, and petite.  She was our high school homecoming queen, Stacy Class; every guy wanted her. And I was the cute dorky student that no one knew. I had a picture of her in my locker. Her locker was next to mine.

I put on the costume; the costume needed to be dry clean. How could Stacy wear this costume?  I saw some air freshener nearby. I think it was air-freshener, it read “Michael Jackson’s perfume.” So, if I spray it, will it make me dance like Michael Jackson? Let’s see what happened.

I sprayed it, and the odor of the costume did not help. I grabbed a cloth, I think it was a cloth, but it will do. It was someone bra. Smell good. So, I used it as a gas mask for I could breathe fresh air and I was good. I put the head of the Eagle on, and I got the panty hose for the Eagle’s legs.

And I walked out; people were cheering for me because I was underneath the Eagle costume. I did the moon walk like Michael Jackson would do, and the audience went wild with it. Maybe the Michael Jackson perfume did work on me.

Then I heard Stacy voice from the girl’s locker room.

“Who are you? I am coming for you” Stacy said.

I turned my beak around, and I saw Stacy staring at me.

Would you believe she was wearing a cheerleader outfit without no bra and wet hair? She charged at me.  I ran around the court, and she was chasing me.  The audience was laughing and cheering for either of us.

Then I tripped, and she landed on top of my back. She flipped me over and took off my mask, and she found her bra on my face. She took that off too.

“What are you doing?” Stacy said. She was on top of me.

“I got laid?” I said, smiling. I was on the ground.

The crowd laugh. She was embarrassed.

It was hysterical.

So you think you are smart

Posted on by sillykhan

Hurray! You graduate and got a diploma from high school you are ready to conquer the world!  Eventually you work hard and study smart. You find a relationship between the subject matter you were learning, and now you have to applied what you have learned.

You can follow your dreams and pursue your passion – what more hard work to do. What you going to do this summer – goof off? You need the training and skill. Time is limited. You have four months before school starts and next year is your last year. What were you doing for the past years? Goofing off.  Studying is good, but when you have breaks in between like the holidays and administrative days off.  You could have done something. Cleaning is good, we all need to clean our rooms or the whole house, for people can be invited. Or work on the project that will sometime be your career life.

Find a team of friends that will help your career with special skills. Work on a budget. Most people started out on shoes string budget, finding cheap stuff and making it big.  People are creative when they built stuff. Put that in your resume.

Take a summer class at your local community college, a business class for perhaps. Most careers now these days want someone in management, a leader, how to do inventory, and handling money.

Get a job and work either Part-time or Full-time.  You need cash and spend it wisely, money is crucial and important, don’t buy junk that you don’t need. It’s a waste of money. You need to save for important reasons. You need a break some time. Summer is beach time! And then go back to work!

Don’t end your life to soon. Drive carefully. Everyday there is a car crash and their life is gone in an instant. Just drive carefully.

Parents always tell you that nighttime is dangerous and it is. It’s the worst, more crime happens at night until the sunrise. You hear it every day in the news there’s a crime committed day or night. If you don’t read the news then you don’t know what’s happening in the world – what Donald Trump is president? What have you done? Oh, the world is safe. Lesser crime is happening.

Always check base with your family and friends, if your parents want to put a GPS locator on you, let them. You will be safe.  And you wouldn’t be an unsolved case that happened 20 years ago.

Are students really smart?

Posted on by sillykhan

High School and Middle school students think they could get away without being caught when they write a paper, and the teacher would give the student a failing grade, because the paper. The paper was identical to one of the smartest students who handed to the teacher in the beginning of the class. Student’s think they are David Copperfield, a fame magician who uses sleight of hand tricks, but for students, their sleight of hand tricks could get a slap of the hand by the ruler.

When would teenagers ever learn not to copy and paste, but give the right sources or some documentation to the paper? Do they know how to read and summarize and then give the citation sources? The teacher is giving all the resources to the students, and the students are not using the resource’s material that was given? Students don’t care.

And why do students have to procrastinate at the last minute. Cramming everything within a twenty-four-hour period. Students think or work better, under pressure. I have that song stuck in my head, “Ice Ice Baby” singing ‘Under Pressure’. When they work under pressure, either they get tired and fall asleep in the class while taking a test or use the mouth drool as the answer. Do they learn how to read and write and then summarize it?

Did you know that some teenagers use the internet to solve algebraic problems? Just type in the equation and the answer is solved. What’s wrong with solving by hand and understand how to do it? Algebra is supposed to be easy, even a fifth grader can solve it.

We use algebraic everyday in our lives, like how many French fries can be used when there’s a crowd of 40 people in line? You need more. One basket French Fries would not help.

Or how fast can a bullet travel when leaving from a gun? That’s a calculus problem. My niece wanted to be cop or a CSI agent. She loves watching CSI on CBS. However, it’s hard work to be a cop or CSI agent. We got to have math and science.

When a teenager tells an adult to Google it, Yahoo it or Bing it. They are not being as smart as they are supposed to be. The student should figure it out. They are supposed to learn and put it in their brain. The student should learn how to read and find out things. Analyze and use their critical-thinking skills to see if they are smart enough to pass the class for the third time in the sixth grade!

If they could understand relationship problems with their friends or boyfriend/girlfriend, they could use the same principle in reading a book. What are the character motivations in the book? Is Bella Swan really pregnant? Would she have baby werewolves or vampire babies?

Adults don’t care. They have to work and make money. Teenagers don’t care they are either texting to their friends, and their spelling is awful when they text. Have they taken English classes? They are using improper grammar while texting – spell out the words!

A teenage mind is full of tricks, don’t waste your time pranking an adult. The student would wind up in jail for doing something stupid – let that be a lesson. Enjoy prison food and the toilet is right next to the bed – remember to close the lid before going to sleep.